Don Mann: Focusing on my Craft

Thursday, Sept. 09, 2004 - 11:05 p.m.

Is this not what you came to see?

"Run run the past is gone, it cannot be undone

Run run the future is here, our fate is drawing near!"

I've hit a new low, even in this place where I consider myself to be the most important of all people for as long as the keystrokes last...yet I feel low.

I'm drinking straight-up vodka, listening to Ayreon and trying to lose myself in the music. I'm wondering now why I am where I am, trying to trace back the events that led up to this moment.

I'm going to be on the road a lot tomorrow, driving to manchester and then to Portland. My first instinct was to call Jesse...but quickly I reconsidered.

"I'd sacrifice my very life

To have you at my side

Like a dream I see your face

Through the misty haze

We were one amid the stars

And time never healed my scars

Deep inside the sadness burns

I must return!"

Jesus, I just had a heart murmur.

Anyways. I'm beginning to think I am bipolar, or something like that. I go from the highest of highs to the lowest of lows. Right now is the interval between, where I recognize the oncoming storm approaching and quickly drown my motor skills in alcohol...if I didn't, I don't know what I'd do. I've never been a violent man...

This was a bad idea even for me.

"I rest my broken heart, where the willows weep."

Delve Into The Past - Onward Into The Future