Don Mann: Focusing on my Craft

Monday, Feb. 09, 2004 - 5:48 a.m.

Now all the others are asleep, and I am the last one awake. I wanted to be the first to fall, now I feel that I could not sleep if I tried.

Those who do not remember the past are condemned to repeat it.

I have spent the last hour looking at pictures I've taken, a whole year of memories lying in wait for me, old wounds begging to be reopened. Some don't phase me, while others stir up an emotional part of my subconscious that burns like flames around my heart, and spins like a razor blade tornado in my stomach.

I've learned more tonight about who I am than I could ever care to know. The reason for this is that I don't like what I've discovered.

...and now, I suddenly have no urge to live or die, the cold indifference has once again settled upon my conscience.

Just one thing tears at me, a windy autumn day which she promised me "ought to be interesting". Little did I know that this would be the day I cast out my heart, indifferent to its return, ignorant to everything but the then and there.

Just because you're gone doesn't mean my love is.

I'm already as good as dead, and I have no one to apologize to because they are all drifting in dreamtime. Sleep well my friends, and may heavens forbid that you should awaken in my reality.

Delve Into The Past - Onward Into The Future